Monday, December 22, 2008

Finding an Agency

How to pick an agency?

When I called Virginia's Department of Social Services to "start the process" they gave me the number of an agency, but so far, I'm not feeling great about the agency they sent us to. There are apparently two people at that agency who handle waiting children adoptions; one of them is on maternity leave for the next three months. The other one's new and doesn't return phone calls worth a damn.

So far the only online recommendation I can find anywhere is a listing for GLBTQ Friendly Adoption Agencies, which lists only one gay-friendly adoption agency in all of Virginia. I'm not gay, but I like people who are friendly to the sisters, the agency is actually within walking distance of my apartment (weather permitting) and that agency's website is my favorite so far (the design is horrible, but the content is good). Plus, when I called them at 4:55 in the afternoon, four days before Christmas, I got a real person on the phone. Not the person I needed to talk to, but still, it was nice.

Still, it feels like I'm picking an adoption agency with about the same shot-in-the-dark deliberation I use to choose a real estate agent. I want someone who will return phone calls and who knows the ropes, but isn't jaded by the system, someone who knows these kids and is going to match us with somebody we'd be good for. I want somebody who I'm going to go back to for kid #2. I want somebody I'll add to my Christmas card list, and not the generic list, the special cool people list I keep for the anne taintor cards.

Where are you, adoption professional of my dreams?


  1. I'd find a yahoogroup or similar discussion board, start scouring for locals and pick their brains. That's how I've started and by talking to several people you'll likely get a good sense of what's out there.

    Good luck!

  2. I understand your frustration. I went with the agency that was good woth the calls and asked me questions. You depend on these people, you need to know that they can at least call you back. You are a rare commodity in their world. They should be falling all over themselves to help you become a parent.